Four-leaf clovers? Check. ‘Kiss Me I’m Irish’ t-shirt? Check. Green beer? YUCK. It’s time to strap on your lucky boots, grow your big orange beard out, and make sure you’ve got enough sick days in the bank to get time off for what many deem to be a legitimate stat: St. Patrick’s Day.
Normally, our drunken sommelier Steven likes to chat wine. But even a fella as snobby as him has room for the Irish spirit and a few pints of the dark stuff come March 17th.
On that note, TAG Liquor Stores is happy to bring you a few Guinness-inspired St. Paddy’s Day cocktails to help you stand in solidarity with leprechauns all over the world.
Be sure to order your goods online, right to your door, at www.tagliquorstores.com
Feeling lucky? Let’s dive in!
1. The Snakebite
Since the celebration of this “holiday” is a blatant appropriation of Irish culture committed by people all over the world, we may as well stir up some nationalistic sacrilege right off the bat and introduce you to the classic Snakebite cocktail.
What is it? Half Guinness, half Strongbow, the English dry apple cider that we all love. Step 1: Fill your glass half-full with cider. Now, the trick to executing this one perfectly is to float the Guinness on top of the Strongbow using some sort of straining device or even holding a spoon over the cider and pouring the Guinness on top; this way, the Guinness lands like a butterfly with sore feet and will make a gorgeous two-toned beverage. Be sure to pour the Guinness on top as SOON as you open it so it retains that fresh foam and floats properly.
Though Guinness is naturally light in texture, defying its colour, the cider really gives it a lift and turns it into a cocktail that is as refreshing as a slide down a fresh & misty rainbow towards a pot of gold.
2. The Black & Tan
If you’re the type of character who might need a little more therapy before you’re caught drinking cider, fear not: there’s still a delicious Guinness cocktail for you so you don’t get all sensitive and feel left out! Speaking of therapy…This delish concoction is called the Black & Tan, and it’s half Guinness, half Smithwick’s red ale, a true Irish staple.
Simply follow the same instructions as the Snakebite, and make sure you float that Guinness on top properly! We’d say that nothing is more Irish than the Black & Tan, but that would go against the cocktail we’re about to finish with…
3. The Irish Slammer
For non-millennial types, you might know this stomach-churner (it’s all in good fun!) by its horribly offensive, snowflake-melting name, the Irish Car Bomb. Our producers told us we couldn’t say that name, but we just did. Better call the lawyer. Anyway, for those of you who haven’t enjoyed the festive fortune of one of these puppies, this is literally as Irish as it gets in terms of the pure volume of Irish exports being unceremoniously combined together.
The recipe, to wit:
1 x Guinness Stout, 3/4 full in a pint glass
.5 oz of Bailey’s Irish Cream topped with .5 oz of Jameson Irish Whiskey in the same shot glass
Simply eye up your new leprechaun pals, yell “Sláinte” (pronounced slawn-che), drop the shot glass into your pint of Guinness, and move it on down the hatch! Maybe call your mother and tell her you love her before you do so, then call her in the morning again to apologize.
All of the ingredients you need to have the luckiest St. Paddy’s Day of your life, complete with those to make all three of the above cocktails are available in-person at TAG Liquor Store locations or online at TAGLiquorStores.com where you can have these products delivered right to your door.
On that note, be safe, practice the consensual kissing of Irish people, and SLÁINTE from all of us at TAG Liquor Stores!